Essay 3.3 Divorce, Remarriage and Kids: Turning Lemons into Lemonade

In third grade at the tender age of 7, I began attending St. John’s Catholic School. I instantly clicked with a group of four girls and we were soon known as the “Fab 5”. Then came the weekend that I had been awaiting, my turn to have the group over for the first fun-filled sleepover at my house. My new friends seemed confused by my family situation; they asked me about my parents and why I have a step-dad. I told them simply, “My parents are divorced”. I received a look of sorrow, sympathy, and compassion all wrapped up in one from all four girls (all with married parents). They all came close and rubbed my back and said, “Oh, we’re so sorry. Are you okay?” I felt as if I had just revealed that I had been living with a life-threatening illness. Divorce is not a death sentence to the children involved and doesn’t mean you’re doomed. Not only did I turn out fine, in a way I’m glad my parents got divorced.

Normally when people who didn’t experience divorce think about it, they picture scenarios that we see in the media. They often think of children being torn between parents, parents fighting for custody and arguing constantly. “Mrs. Doubtfire” is a great illustration of this stigma of divorce in the media. In this movie the parents went through a nasty divorce with a competition for love of the children. The father was limited to see his children only once a week and argued with his ex-wife about everything. You could see through the kid’s rebellious behavior and outright unhappiness that this was a very stressful situation. Yes, this is an extreme example in the media; but I think it’s avoidable.

Divorce is becoming more and more popular. According to “Divorce Statistics” , about 50% of marriages will end up in divorce, and of these 40% of divorces involve children. (Divorce Magazine) My health teacher also mentioned that often couples would separate but not go through with all of the hassles of a legal divorce; so this number could be even higher than we think. These statistics show that divorce is a major issue and concern in our nation and will affect many children.

My parents divorced in 1994, when I was only three. My mom, the hair salon owner, explained it to me as “Daddy likes to play golf and mommy likes to cut hair.” This simple explanation was enough to satisfy my questions on why we were moving in to our own apartment. My mom always talked me through any concerns I had and made it somewhat of a positive situation. I would ask the occasional question on when I was going to see my Dad, but I never was distressed or truly concerned with the change. It was just something I grew up with.

Many couples who are having troubles in their marriage will try to stick it out and stay together for the kids, but I think this often causes more stress because the children are forced to witness arguments and tension within the marriage. According to Christina McGhee, an author and speaker on divorce and educating parents, “One of parents’ greatest concerns is how divorce will affect their children.” (McGee, par. 2) When children are involved, it can affect whether or not the couple will separate. My parents have both told me that they didn’t want to put me through the stress of their differences. My parents knew it would be easier on me if they were friendly and cooperative. They communicated with each other almost every day; they both wanted to play a normal parent role in my life. They made decisions together and both talked to me about the separation very often, asking me how I was doing with the change and always offering to answer any questions I had. Whereas most parents have the mentality that a divorce would hinder the child’s future, my parents believed that it would be best for me in the long run.

I never asked the devastating question, “was this my fault?” Feeling guilty as the child is a common response; many children can feel as if they caused their parents to fight and not be happy. My parents always reinforced that it had nothing to do with me and kind of made it seem like not a big deal. In an article titled “The Effects of Divorce on Children”, Lesley Foulkes-Jamison states, “Parents' sensitivity to their child's needs is one of the most important factors in facilitating adjustment.” (Foulkes-Jamison, par 2) My parents knew how tough this could potentially be on me and gave me a lot of support. I grew up with the mentality that they just weren’t meant for each other and were better off as friends. I now believe that if there’s no hope for the marriage, divorce can be the best option if support and a lot of communication are given to the children.

Although I didn’t really struggle with my parents’ divorce, some aspects of it still affected me. When I was 5 or 6 my mom was dating my current stepfather. He was also divorced and had two daughters. My mom decided that it would be great to meet them because we were all within two years of each other. But the thing was, up to that point I was an only child; I received all of my parent’s attention and was basically spoiled rotten. So, when my (now) stepsisters came over for the first time my mom suggested I go show them my room. When they started touching my Pink Barbie Dreamhouse and all of my perfectly dressed dolls, I yelled in my angry high-pitched voice, “Don’t touch those! You’re messing everything up!” Not only was I a bad sharer, I think I realized that these weren’t just friends coming over to play, but they were girls who my Mom seemed to truly care about. My mom calmed me down and she made me realize how cool it would be to have new sisters, or at that point, just new friends. My temper tantrum was definitely an obstacle I had to overcome. Now looking back, my stepsisters are basically my real sisters. This negative reaction to new girls in my life is not that strange and is actually quite normal. Most children go through a time of learning how to share and even feeling threatened by family friends’ children. Just because it was the daughters of the new man my mother was dating, it truly worried her. But, I think I would have had this reaction with any strangers. However, I think this is evidence that yes, some things did affect me but I was able to adjust. I think most kids can adjust to these changes and grow into healthy adults with the proper support and acknowledgement of the less than optimal situation.

A few years after the divorce, both of my parents remarried which means I got double the parents, double the grandparents and double the aunts and uncles. In The Journal of Divorce and Remarriage, Brian Higginbotham, Linda Skogrand, and Eliza Torres published an article titled “Stepfamily Education: Perceived Benefits for Children”. This study looked at stepfamilies and the effects they have on the children and the marriage. The researchers state, “The presence of children from a previous relationship makes new family relationships more complex.” (Higginbotham, Skogrand, and Torres 1) When I reacted negatively to my future stepsisters it truly worried my Mom. She didn’t know if her remarrying was selfish and it affected the course of her and my stepfather’s relationship. Now looking back, I definitely warmed up to the situation after a few weeks because of the way my mom comforted me and seemed to truly understand my concerns. I think when parents don’t acknowledge the child’s potential troubles that come with these changes and don’t address them, that’s when emotional problems can arise.

On the other end of the spectrum, my best friend Celia is 20 and her parents recently divorced. Her and her siblings didn’t take it so well. I think that this was because her parents assumed they were all old enough to deal with the situation. She didn’t get the support I grew up with and now as an adult has to deal with much harder issues. My parents never “trash-talked” each other because they were very civil and of course, because I was only three. She gets to hear all of the actual fighting and knows so much more about the divorce than I did when I was an oblivious 3-year-old. I think divorce will be tough for most kids, no matter the age, but the stress can be relieved with help and understanding.

The support I received was make-or-break for my future. Now as an ‘adult’, I think my parent’s divorce definitely turned out for the best. Instead of seeing one suffering marriage, I saw two successful marriages. I consider my stepparents just like my real parents. Now, I also have a total of four sisters (two step and two half) who are all my best friends. I would argue that if done in the right way, and with a lot of support and communication, divorce can be the best option for a failing marriage. I think my parents handled this situation the best way they could, which caused me to come out of it believing in marriage and relationships. Not only did I receive double the presents on holidays and get to go on two vacations a summer, I also got double the family and double the love.


Works Cited

“Divorce Statistics”. DivorceStatistics.com. Divorce Magazine. n.d. Web. 13 April 2010.

Foulkes-Jamison, Lesley. “Effects of Divorce on Children.” Gainesville Family Magazine. 1 Jan. 2001. Web. 13 April 2010.

Higginbotham, Brian, Linda Skogrand and Eliza Torres. “Stepfamily Education: Perceived Benefits for Children”. Journal of Divorce and Remarriage 3:51 (2010). 36-49, Web. 13 April 2010.

McGhee, Christina. DivorceandChildren.com. Divorce and Children. 2009. Web. 14 April 2010.

Writing Center Essay 3

I forgot to blog about going to the writing center...

I first went Thursday of last week and met with a girl who didn't seem very helpful. I didn't get the criticism I wanted and she just liked everything. She also didn't seem to have very much input on how to improve my argument just, "sure that sounds fine." So, I decided to go back.

I went back Tuesday (yesterday) after making a lot of changes to my paper. I changed the intro and took some things out and added some. But, I didn't really make any changes that my first helper suggested. The person who helped me the second time around was much more helpful and gave me a lot of good advice. She helped me to first figure out who my audience would be which helped with some issues of things that didn't really fit in. But overall, she helped me to clarify and gave me suggestions on when to expand on things and we agreed on stuff to take out. Overall it was very positive

Class Reflection

I signed up for this class only because I had to; not because I like writing or waking up for an 8am class. Coming in I wasn't sure what to expect. I knew from friends that GWRTC 103 wasn't a impossible class and that it was somewhat easy to do well. I also had the idea coming in that I wasn't really going to enjoy it; I didn't really like writing. It wasn't that I just didn't like doing it, it didn't come naturally for me. Whenever I wrote good papers I either sat down, made an outline and had a clear organization for my paper and just filled it in. Or sometimes I would just procrastinate and throw down some information and opinions and get an A on the assignment. So I guess I just had lack of consistency in my writing.

This class helped me a lot. I learned more techniques and strategies to help my writing and make it more effective. In this class we studied arguments, but what we learned about commas, sources, credibility, acknowledgment and response, and the rhetorical appeals can be used it a lot of papers. I liked that we learned three different ways to argue; I liked the narrative the best and rebuttal the least. I think a narrative was one of the best ways to prove a point and give emotion and credibility. I also used narrative elements in my Rogerian argument and I think that also made it effective.

In this class I learned how to better incorporate my research and make it help my paper rather than distract the reader. I also really liked the assignments we had in this class, they were all very interesting.

But most of all, I learned a process of writing. I learned that in some papers I would kind of had like 5 drafts and 5 phases or work. I learned that the more and more you revise and reread the better your paper will be. I learned how to reread my paper, how to edit it, and when things need to be changed. I think this class taught me that writing is a process and sometimes when I didn't feel so great at it was because I would only write one draft. I also really appreciated the workshops. Every assignment I wanted my paper to be workshoped. I learned that now I can just email my papers to someone to get their feedback. Getting others feedback clarifies so much because most of the time my sentences made perfect sense to me but someone else wouldn't understand them.

Overall I got so much more out of this class than I was expecting and learned how to be a better writer and reader; two things that will help me throughout the rest of my career.

Reflection 3.2

In my second draft I feel like I didn't change much. I'm kind of stumped on what to change. I didn't feel like I got really any helpful advice on what to do next. I know that Bryan wanted more sensory details which I agreed with. I added a few things to the "clips" of my life lol. And also to have more of my own voice. I took out a source I didn't really like that much. And kind of worked to get my argument across better- overall I want to argue: that if done correctly with a lot of support and communication divorce can turn out okay. In the beginning I kind of wanted to argue that maybe divorcing when the kids were very young or that divorcing in general was the best thing. And I kind of realized that that's not really true.

In my next draft I definitely want to make more changes but, I'm not really sure where. I know I maybe want to add another story and of course, work on better organization.

Essay 3.2 Divorce: Turning Lemons into Lemonade

Every year since I was three, I got to rip open presents under the Christmas tree and dump out my stocking to see all of the candy and nail polish twice, at two different houses. Compared to my friends, I received double the presents and seemed quite spoiled. But, really this was only due to the fact that my parents were divorced. Christmas and Easter morning seemed that much more exciting because when my little half-sister was done opening presents, I would go over my Dad’s house and open another set of gifts from Santa or another Easter basket from the Easter bunny. I would often ask Mom and Dad for the same items, for example I had two “Baby Born” dolls and was envied by all of my friends. It might sound as if I was quite the manipulator, but hey, might as well milk it for what it was worth. Divorce is known to have a negative impact on children and my parents knew this; they wanted me to be happy in this less than optimal situation. Divorce has played such a major role in my life; I am a product of divorce.

My parents divorced in 1994, when I was only three. My mom, the hair salon owner, explained it to me as “Daddy likes to play golf and mommy likes to cut hair.” This simple explanation was enough to satisfy my questions on why we were moving in to our own apartment. My mom always talked me through any concerns I had and made it somewhat of a positive situation. I would ask the occasional question on when I was going to see my Dad, but I never was distressed or truly concerned with the situation. It was just something I grew up with.

Divorce is becoming more and more popular. According to Divorce Statistics, about 50% of marriages will end up in divorce. They also state that 40% of divorces involve children. (Divorce Statistics). My health teacher also mentioned that often couples will separate but not go through with all of the hassles of a legal divorce; so this number could be even higher that we think. But, this statistic shows divorce is a major issue and concern in our nation and will affect many children.

Many couples will try to stick it out and stay together for the kids, but I think this often causes more stress because the children are forced to witness arguments and tension within the marriage. According to Christina McGhee, an author and speaker on divorce and educating parents, “One of parent’s greatest concerns is how divorce will affect their children.” (Divorce and Children). When children are involved, it will often ultimately affect whether or not the couple will separate. My parents have both told me that they didn’t want to put me through the stress of their differences. So, my parents had a different view than most couples do, they thought the divorce would be better in the long run.

For me, my parents were very friendly and communicated with each other almost everyday. They made decisions together and both talked to me about the separation very often. I also think the reason I think I “turned out fine” was because my parents didn’t have a “nasty” divorce at all. It was a mutual decision that they thought would be most beneficial for me.

I never asked the devastating question, “was this my fault?” my parents always reinforced that it had nothing to do with me and kind of made it seem like not a big deal. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve seen first hand in my friends how much of a challenge it can be to cope with parents’ divorce. In an article titled “The Effects of Divorce on Children”, Lesley Foulkes-Jamison, Ph.D discusses the different cognitive abilities of children at different ages and how they react to divorces at different stages of life. She states, “Parents' sensitivity to their child's needs is one of the most important factors in facilitating adjustment. Other factors such as the child's age, gender and temperament will also influence how well the child adjusts” (Foulkes-Jamison, p. 2). My parents knew how tough this could be on me and gave me a lot of support. I just grew up with the mentality that they just weren’t meant for each other. I think that if it’s truly not going to work out divorce can be the best option if support and a lot of communication are given to the children.

Although I didn’t really struggle with my parents’ divorce, some aspects of it still affected me. When I was 5 or 6 my mom was dating my now stepfather. He was also divorced and had two daughters. My mom decided that it would be great to meet them because we were all within two years of each other. But the thing was, up to that point I was an only child; I received all of my parent’s attention and was basically spoiled rotten. So, when my stepsisters came over for the first time my mom suggested I go show them my room. When they started touching my Pink Barbie Dreamhouse and all of my perfectly dressed dolls, I threw a temper tantrum and had a total meltdown. I think I realized that these weren’t just friends coming over to play, but they were girls who my Mom seemed to truly care about. I was definitely jealous and not a good sharer. My mom then took control and calmed me down. She made me realize how cool it would be to have new sisters, or at that point, just new friends. This was definitely an obstacle I had to overcome. Now looking back, my stepsisters are basically my real sisters. I think this is evidence that yes, some things did affect me but I was able to adjust. I think most kids can adjust to these changes and grow into healthy adults with the proper support.

Both of my parents remarried which means I got double the parents, double the grandparents and double the aunts and uncles. In The Journal of Divorce and Remarriage, Brian Higginbotham, Linda Skogrand, and Eliza Torres published a journal titled: Stepfamily Education: Perceived Benefits for Children. This study looked at step families and the effects they have on the children and the marriage. The researchers state, “The presence of children from a previous relationship makes new family relationships more complex.” (Stepfamily Education). When I reacted negatively to my future stepsisters it truly worried my Mom. She didn’t know if her remarrying was selfish and it affected the course of her and my stepfather’s relationship. Now looking back, I definitely warmed up to the situation after a few weeks because of the way my mom handled this hurdle. I think when parents don’t acknowledge the child’s potential troubles with these changes and don’t address them, that’s when emotional problems can arise.

But now, as an ‘adult’, I think my parent’s divorce definitely turned out for the best. Instead of seeing one suffering marriage, I saw two successful marriages. I also got two new stepparents, which I consider my real parents. Out of this situation I also got a total of four sisters (two step and two half) who are all my best friends. I would argue that if done in the right way, and with a lot of support and communication, divorce can be the best option for a failing marriage. I think my parents handled this situation the best way they could, which caused me to come out of it believing in marriage and relationships with no emotional problems from the divorce. Not only did I receive double the presents on holidays, I also got double the family and double the love.



Works Cited

Divorce Statistics. Divorce Magazine. Web. 13 April 2010.

Foulkes-Jamison, Lesely. “Effects of Divorce on Children.” Gainesville Family Magazine. 1 Jan. 2001. Web. 13 April 2010.

Higginbotham, Brian, Linda Skogrand and Eliza Torres. “Stepfamily Education: Perceived Benefits for Children”. Journal of Divorce and Remarriage 3:51 (2010). 36-49, Web. 13 April 2010.

McGhee, Christina. Divorce and Children. 2009. Web. 14 April 2010.

Reflection 3.1

In my first draft I feel I was somewhat productive compared to my other two first drafts. But, as always I just kinda saying what I had to thought and it wasn't very organized. In my next draft I want to:

-work on organization
-add more personal stories (sensory details)
-work on clarifying what I'm trying to argue
-strong conclusion

I'm also feeling kind of confused on what I'm arguing. I want to re-evaluate my views and claims. I want to be clear on my points and what I'm trying to say.

Sentence Variety

My parents divorced in 1994, when I was only three. (S) SIMPLE My mom, the hair salon owner, explained it to me as “Daddy likes to play golf and mommy likes to cut hair.” (L) COMPOUND This simple explanation was enough to satisfy my questions on why we were moving in to our own apartment. (M)SIMPLE I would ask the occasional question on when I was going to see my Dad, but I never was distressed or truly concerned with the situation. (L) COMPLEX It was just something I grew up with. (S)-SIMPLE

Essay 3.1 Postive Outcomes of Divorce

Every Christmas since I was three, I got to open presents under the tree at two different houses. Compared to my friends, I received double the presents and seemed quite spoiled. But, really this was only due to the fact that my parents were divorced. Christmas and Easter morning seemed that much more exciting because when my little half-sister was done opening presents, I would go over my Dad’s house and open another set of gifts from Santa. I would often ask Mom and Dad for the same items, for example I had two “Baby Born” dolls and was envied by all of my friends. It might sound as if I was quite the manipulator, but hey, might as well milk it for what it was worth. Divorce is known to have a negative impact on children and my parents knew this; they wanted me to be happy in this less than optimal situation. Divorce has played such a major role in my life; I am a product of divorce.

My parents divorced in 1994, when I was only three. My mom, the hair salon owner, explained it to me as “Daddy likes to play golf and mommy likes to cut hair.” This simple explanation was enough to satisfy my questions on why we were moving in to our own apartment. I would ask the occasional question on when I was going to see my Dad, but I never was distressed or truly concerned with the situation. It was just something I grew up with.

Divorce is becoming more and more popular. According to Divorce Statistics, about 50% of marriages will end up in divorce. They also state that 40% of divorces involve children. (Divorce Statistics). My health teacher also mentioned that often couples will separate but not go through with all of the hassles of a legal divorce; so this number could be even higher that we think. But, this statistic shows divorce is a major issue and concern in our nation and will affect many children.

Many couples will try to stick it out and stay together for the kids, but I think this often causes more stress because the children are forced to witness arguments and tension within the marriage. According to Christina McGhee, an author and speaker on divorce and educating parents, “One of parent’s greatest concerns is how divorce will affect their children.” (Divorce and Children). When children are involved, it will often affect whether or not the couple separates.

In an article that appeared on HelpGuide titled “Children and Divorce: Helping Your Kids Cope with the Effects of Separation and Divorce”, by Gina Kemp, Rosemary Clandos, Jeanne Segaul, “Many kids feel angry, sad and frustrated about the prospect of their parents splitting up for good and are uncertain about what life will be like after divorce” (Children and Divorce, p. 1). According to this article, it emphasizes the importance of support and communication to help the kids deal with this major change. For me, my parents were very friendly and communicated with each other almost everyday. They made decisions together and both talked to me about the separation very often. I also think the reason I think I “turned out fine” was because my parents didn’t have a “nasty” divorce at all. It was a mutual decision that they thought would be most beneficial for me.

I never asked the devastating question, “was this my fault?” my parents always reinforced that it had nothing to do with me and kind of made it seem like not a big deal. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve seen first hand in my friends how much of a challenge it can be to cope with parents’ divorce. In an article titled “The Effects of Divorce on Children”, Lesley Foulkes-Jamison, Ph.D discusses the different cognitive abilities of children at different ages and how they react to divorces at different stages of life. She states, “Parents' sensitivity to their child's needs is one of the most important factors in facilitating adjustment. Other factors such as the child's age, gender and temperament will also influence how well the child adjusts” (Foulkes-Jamison, p. 2). My parents knew how tough this could be on me and gave me a lot of support. I just grew up with the mentality that they just weren’t meant for each other. I think that if it’s truly not going to work out divorce can be the best option if support and a lot of communication are given to the children.

Although I didn’t really struggle with my parents’ divorce, some aspects of it still affected me. When I was 5 or 6 my mom was dating my now stepfather. He was also divorced and had two daughters. My mom decided that it would be great to meet them because we were all within two years of each other. But the thing was, up to that point I was an only child; I received all of my parent’s attention and was basically spoiled rotten. So, when my stepsisters came over for the first time my mom suggested we go into my room and play with my Barbies and other toys. When they started playing with my things I freaked out and had a total meltdown. I think I realized that these weren’t just friends coming over to play, but they were girls who my Mom seemed to truly care about. I was definitely jealous and not a good sharer. This was definitely an obstacle I had to overcome. Now looking back, my stepsisters are basically my real sisters. I think this is evidence that yes, some things did affect me but I was able to adjust. I think most kids can adjust to these changes and grow into healthy adults with the proper support.

Both of my parents remarried which means I got double the parents. In The Journal of Divorce and Remarriage, Brian Higginbotham, Linda Skogrand, and Eliza Torres published a journal titled: Stepfamily Education: Perceived Benefits for Children. This study looked at step families and the effects they have on the children and the marriage. The researchers state, “The presence of children from a previous relationship makes new family relationships more complex.” (Stepfamily Education). When I reacted negatively to my future stepsisters it truly worried my Mom. She didn’t know if her remarrying was selfish and affected the course of her and my stepfather’s relationship. Now looking back, I definitely warmed up to the situation after a few weeks but some children don’t adjust and cause more problems.

But now, as an ‘adult’, I think my parent’s divorce definitely turned out for the best. Instead of seeing one suffering marriage, I saw two successful marriages. I also got two new stepparents, which I consider my real parents. Out of this situation I also got a total of four sisters (two step and two half) who are all my best friends. I would argue that if done in the right way, divorce can be the best option for a failing marriage. I think my parents handled this situation the best way they could, which caused me to come out of it believing in marriage and relationships with no emotional problems from the divorce. Not only did I receive double the presents on holidays, I also got double the family and double the love.



Works Cited

Divorce Statistics. Divorce Magazine. Web. 13 April 2010.

Foulkes-Jamison, Lesely. “Effects of Divorce on Children.” Gainesville Family Magazine. 1 Jan. 2001. Web. 13 April 2010.

Higginbotham, Brian, Linda Skogrand and Eliza Torres. “Stepfamily Education:
Perceived Benefits for Children”. Journal of Divorce and Remarriage 3:51 (2010). 36-49, Web. 13 April 2010.

Kemp, Gina Rosemary Clandos and Jeanne Segal. “Children and Divorce: Helping your kids cope with the effects of separation and divorce.” Helpguide. January 2009. Web. 15 April 2010.

McGhee, Christina. Divorce and Children. 2009. Web. 14 April 2010.

Rogerian Reflection

I actually really enjoyed writing this paper. I think it was because I picked a topic that I was really passionate about, and truly having this debate in my own head. I think after doing the research and learning more about both sides I honestly did learn a compromise for the situation and that accreditation for these facilities that make money off of the animals needs to be pushed. I also came to the conclusion that I'm not going to be supporting a circus again.

I feel like it was helpful to have the Rogerian structure and to state both sides in a clear way. I think it helped ultimately shape my paper and make it clear and easy to understand. Before I actually implemented this structure the paper said what I needed it to, but not in an effective way.

Overall, I really enjoyed this paper. It was different from what I had written before and I think I learned more about having Rogerian qualities and different methods of argument/persuasion.

Essay 2.3 Animals In Captivity: Torture or for Education?

Over the years, I grew up with a great appreciation for animals; I was always known as the ‘animal lover’. I had a need to pet every dog in sight and shocked my friends’ dads when they cowered in fear while I captured a spider to release it back outside. Like most kids, I was always excited to go to the zoo and just watch all different types of animals in their natural habitats. Little did I know, these are not their natural habitats at all. I’ve begun to rethink whether zoos, aquariums or circuses are a good thing or not. There has been much debate concerning whether or not these places are ethical and in the best interest of the animals. The more and more I’ve looked into this issue, it seems that many of these zoos, aquariums and circuses are more negative than positive.

Places where you can see animals are considered to be magical and educational entertainment. For my family, going to the zoo was one of the most fun things we could do. Learning about the different types of fish at the aquarium and watching the giraffes eat from the tallest trees was the highlight of my year. These experiences gave me an appreciation for animals; going to these places to learn more about animals is what made me an animal lover.

Having the opportunity to see wild animals in real life will have much more of an impact towards the education than will reading about them in a book. Only a select few children are privileged enough to actually go scuba diving or on an African Safari; zoos and aquariums provide easy access for everyone to witness these amazing animals.

Endangered species are often saved by human intervention. Humans can help save species in captivity by breeding and prolonging lives through medical care. In the Journal of the American Veterinary Medical Association, senior staff writer Bridget M. Kuehn states in the journal: “Is it ethical to keep animals in zoos?”, “Zoos support conservation by educating the public, raising money for conservation programs, developing technology that can be used to track wild populations, conducting scientific research, advancing veterinary medicine, and developing animal handling techniques” (Kuehn, par. 11). Zoos and aquariums fulfill the need to protect animals who are affected by humans harmful actions on their habitats.

Endangered animal populations have been replenished by the human actions. According to a journal in the American Veterinary Medical Association titled: “In defense of zoos and aquariums: the ethical basis for keeping wild animals in captivity” claims that populations such as the California condor and the Oregon silverspot butterfly have benefited from research to rehabilitate and release these organisms. (Hutchins, Smith, Allard, par. 14). The use of zoos as breeding facilities has recovered species that might not have made it without captivity.

Zoos have many benefits for protecting endangered species, but many organizations don’t meet the Association of Zoos and Aquariums (AZA) accreditation. According to the AZA website, fewer than 10% of animal exhibitors in the United States meet this accreditation (Benefits of Accreditation, Par. 4). The major zoos and aquariums throughout the United States provide safe environments for wild animals with proper care, but the other 90% do not.

On February 24th 2010, Tilikum, the great orca whale fatally attacked his second trainer at Sea World in Orlando, Florida. According to an article in Time, Tilikum grabbed his trainer, Brancheau, by her ponytail and dragged her to the bottom of the pool where she drowned (Chua- Eoan, par. 2). This brings up the question, are humans meant to work with and domesticate these wild animals? I think it’s shocking that after Tilly’s first murder, he was still expected to perform.

These amazingly intelligent animals are captured and put into tanks that would be proportional to a human living in a bathtub. According to PETA, Orca whales swim up to 100 miles a day in the wild and are imprisoned in confining tanks (Marine Animal Exhibits: Chlorinated Prisons, par. 5). Think about the natural habitat of a polar bear-the very cold Arctic Circle-yet there are polar bear exhibits in zoos all over the world, often nowhere near their natural climate. And I’m sure there aren’t hundreds of people passing by and tapping on the glass in the wild either. Richard Ellis, a marine conversationalist, states in a live Q&A for the Washington Post, “It is part of human nature to keep wild animals in small spaces and train them to do tricks. I'm against it because I think it humiliates the animals” (Ellis, par. 6). Animals in captivity aren’t the same animal they would be in the wild; often these creatures are living a life that nature didn’t intend for them.

Marine animal exhibits such as Sea World train whales and dolphins to jump through hoops, swim with the trainers and of course, splash the audience. As a little girl, I always left the aquarium in awe of the talent and intelligence of the mammals in these performances. But now I know these tricks and moves are not natural for these animals at all. According to PETA, “Animals forced to perform are subjected to rigorous and abusive training methods to coerce them into doing stressful, confusing, uncomfortable, and even painful acts” (Live Animal Acts and Exhibits: Anguished ‘Entertainers’, par. 4). Many zoos don’t show natural behaviors or natural interactions, we only see trainers handling and feeding the animals. These zoos and aquariums shouldn’t be applauded for teaching about wild animals; rather, they should only be given credit for showing how some animals are capable of adapting to such a drastic change.

When I was 6, my Dad took me to the circus and I was captivated by the animals. So much that I begged him for a T-shirt with all of the animals on it, which I still have today. But, now I’ve learned that circuses have the worst reputation for animal cruelty and are on a much higher level for abuse than most zoos and aquariums. I personally understand the lure and excitement as a child to see elephants balance on stands and see tigers jump through fire. But, the truth isn’t as glamorous as we are made to believe.

Not only do animals in the circus experience tough travel and living conditions, the process of training them is very disturbing. According to PETA, the most common method of training is physical punishment, often by hitting, electric shock, and whipping (Circuses: Three Rings of Abuse, par. 8). I don’t think anyone would want to support these helpless circus animals be beaten in order for our entertainment. According an informational pamphlet on circuses from the Humane Society, circuses travel all year round all over the world. Elephants, lions and monkeys are put in small cages and taken from town to town. These animals are often not given proper care and don’t have access to basic necessities while traveling. The animals are often only released from their cages in order to perform, and when performing they are sometimes leashed and shackled. (The Truth Behind the Big Top, page 2). We often hear from musicians how difficult and exhausting life on the road can be, but circus animals endure extreme circumstances.

The temperatures and climates these animals experience while traveling from town to town are definitely not what they would experience in a natural setting. According to PETA, “A young lion named Clyde died in a sweltering boxcar as a Ringling Bros. train crossed the Mojave Desert on a day when temperatures exceeded 100°F” (Circuses: Three Rings of Abuse, par. 3). There have been many other preventable fatalities of circus animals because lack of veterinary care and basic necessities for survival while on the road.

I don’t think these programs should be done away with, but I think something needs to be done to enforce the accreditation of all zoos and aquariums. I also think animals such as Tilikum who have not adapted very well, should not still be held in captivity. There are other options for him such as sanctuaries where he can live in a normal environment with other whales. There are other options to learn about these creatures, technology has come so far. I sincerely hope everyone can agree that circuses need the biggest intervention. There needs to be a conscientious effort to help the animals that suffer daily, circuses that travel all over the world should not be allowed to have animals in their shows, I think this issue needs to be discussed in order for a change to take place for these circus animals.

As I’ve seen personally, there are great benefits to zoos and aquariums. These organizations provide a place for people to learn about different species and gain an appreciation for them. But, within this great realm of educational facilities, come those who don’t have the best intentions. As I have learned, many of these venues are focused more on profit than the animals’ welfare. We all need to work for the best interest of these charming animals and be a voice for the animals who aren’t able to speak out. I know I will still take my kids to zoos and aquariums in hope of a similar love for animals; but I’ll be sure these organizations are accredited and have good intentions for their animals.




Works Cited


“Benefits of Accreditation.” Aza.org. Association of Zoos and Aquariums. n.d. Web. 14 March 2010.

Chua-Eoan, Howard. “The Killer-Whale Attack at SeaWorld: How It Happened.” U.S. 25 February 2010. New York Times. Web. 14 March 2010.

Ellis, Richard. “Sea World Killer Whale Attack.” 25 February 2010. Washington Post. Web. 13 March 2010.

Hutchins, Michael, Brandie Smith, and Ruth Allard. “In defense of zoos and aquariums: the ethical basis for keeping wild animals in captivity”. Journal of the American Veterinary Medical Association. 223.7 (2003): p. 960. Web. 29 March 2010.

Kuehn, Bridget. “Is it ethical to keep animals in zoos?” Journal of the American Veterinary Medical Association. (2002). n. pag. Web. 14 March 2

PETA. People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. 2010. Web. 13 March 2010.

The Truth Behind the Big Top. Washington D.C. The Humane Society of the United States. 2007.

Setting Exercise

When thinking back on my childhood home, my favorite room would have to be my bedroom. My room was a place that I could decorate and arrange however I felt that month. It was the only room in the upstairs of our house with high, slanted ceilings which gave me a sense of independence. I had a huge (full) bed with stuffed animals and pillows overflowing onto the ground. I had fake kitchen toys to play house with and Barbie playhouses left set up in the middle of a scene. I had posters covering every inch of one wall because my mom wouldn't let me spread to the other three walls. Now looking back, my room was quite cluttered, but it was my favorite place to be. It was whatever I wanted it to be.

News Narrative

When looking at the top stories of the newspapers, they mostly deal with health care and other political things. Neither of these really relate to my life in an interesting way. Of course, I am affected by these things, but, I don't really have any stories that will shed light on these situations

There are more social discussions or issues that interest me. Such as using dogs to treat PTSD. I think this is interesting because I know how greatly a dog can affect your mood and spirits. But I'm also not sure that I have any specific stories that will contribute to this.

Narrative Argument Pre-Writing

I had a lot of trouble thinking of a topic for this type of argument. I kind of feel like I live an average life that nothing that exciting has happened to. I was in a car accident when I was younger and a cell phone was involved so I was considering arguing why texting should be illegal. I was also thinking my grandmother had just died of melanoma and I could argue how important it is to take care of your skin and wear sun block. This issue is very important to me because I always lecture my friends not to go tanning and to be responsible.

But, the topic I like the best so far would probably be divorce. My parents divorced when I was very young and it has definitely been a major part of my life. I am a product of divorce and I think throughout my experiences I've learned that the divorce between my mom and dad was the best decision. I think I can argue about divorce being an ultimate evil and that it can have a positive outcome. I think I've turned out fine and as a result I've seen two successful marriages and know what a healthy relationship is. So far, this is my favorite topic, I think my experiences will have a lot to offer that divorce can be the best option.

Voices Exercise 2

Dear Professor,

I just looked at my midterm grade on Blackboard and was wondering why I have a B. I think I meet all of the requirements of the course and always participate in class. I always work hard on my assignments and try to put extra insight into my reflections. I understand you cannot give every student an A in the class but, I think I am deserving of a grade higher than a B. I'm writing this to ask you to reconsider my grade and give me any instruction to receive a higher mark. I'm willing to do any extra work that it takes to improve my grade. If there's any extra credit work I can do to boost my grade in your class and better fulfill your standards please let me know.

Voices Exercise 1

Dear Professor,

I would just like to start off by saying how much I enjoy your class. I am always eager to come to class, it's such an enriching experience. But, I am very distressed by my grade in your course. I work so hard and spend hours every night trying to be the best student I can be. I try to do everything I can to meet your standards. It's so upsetting to me to work so hard and not get the grade to prove it. I'm begging you for a higher grade that better reflects my determination to learn and be an amazing student. Please reconsider my grade and understand how much your course means to me. It's killing me inside to know I work so hard and I'm not getting the results. I will do any extra credit assignments or do whatever it takes to receive a higher grade.

Workshop Reflection

I really loved the whole process of the workshop and getting all of the great feedback. I think overall everyone, along with myself, agrees that I should tone down my EXTREME language to make my paper more Rogerian. And also give more credit to the other side, which I'm waiting for an ILL to get to me to support the other side and to fulfill the requirement of my 2nd scholarly source.

I also agree that I need to state my stance on this issue earlier in the paper. I really got a lot of good advice from the workshop and now know what to work on, clarify and add to my final draft.

Rogerian Reflection 2.2

After writing my second draft I feel my paper is coming along. There are still some things I think I want to change and work on, but it's getting better. In this draft I mostly focused on my organization. In the first draft I kind of just said everything I thought and gave a lot of information, but it wasn't in an useful or beneficial order. I went through and tried to keep all similar ideas together rather than all over the place.

I also worked on giving more support to the other side of the argument. This task wasn't hard because of how much I loved going to the zoo when I was younger, I know first hand how magical these places are and what they mean to other kids. I also talked more about the educational benefits of zoos and circuses. I never would have learned the things I did without going to a zoo- it's what made me an animal lover.

I also worked on a better compromise. Rather than saying animals shouldnt be kept in captivity, I focused more on something we can all agree on- the abuse that takes place in circuses. I think everyone agrees that a circus side-show is often a sad life for an animal to live. These animals are put in extreme situations and don't live normal lives at all, they live the life of a traveler. I think everyone can agree action needs to be taken place to help animals in circuses.

But, I've been struggling to find another scholarly source. I also want to work more on my style of writing, to make the way I write more interesting rather than just talking about facts. I also want to work more on the conclusion and presenting my "common-ground" solution. I have the ideas in place, but I need to find a way to better present them in order to end my paper.

Essay 2.2 Animals In Captivity- torture or for education?

Over the years, I have grown up as a complete animal lover. Like most kids, I was always excited to go to the zoo and watch all different types of animals in their natural habitats. Little did I know, these are not their natural habitats at all. I’ve begun to rethink whether zoos, aquariums or circuses are a good thing or not. There has been much debate concerning whether or not these places are ethical and in the best interest of the animals.

These places to see animals are considered to be magical and educational entertainment. For my family, going to the zoo was one of the most fun things we could do. Learning about the different types of fish at the aquarium and watching the giraffes eat from the trees was the highlight of my year. These experiences gave me an appreciation for animals, going to these places to learn more about animals is what made me an animal lover.

Having the opportunity to see wild animals in real life will have much more of an impact towards the education than will reading about them in a book. Only a select few children are privileged enough to actually go scuba diving or on an African Safari, zoos and aquariums provide easy access for everyone to witness these amazing animals.

Endangered species are often saved by human intervention. Humans can help save species in captivity by breeding and prolonging lives through medical care. Michael Hutchins, PhD, director and William Conway Chair of the Department of Conservation and Science for the American Zoo and Aquarium Association states, “The primary benefits zoos provide to society are education and conservation of species and habitats” (Journal of the American Veterinary Medical Association). I agree, there are many benefits to these organizations but many don’t meet humane standards. Hutchins says less than 10% of animal exhibitors meet the Association of Zoos and Aquariums accreditation. The major zoos and aquariums throughout the United States provide safe environments for wild animals with proper care, but many do not.

On February 24th 2010, Tilikum, the great orca whale murdered his second trainer at Sea World in Orlando, Florida. This would make be Tilikum’s third fatal attack, the third being a man who snuck into the aquarium to swim in the tank (his death was mostly attributed to drowning and hyperthermia). According to an article in Time, Tilikum grabbed his trainer, Brancheau, by her ponytail and dragged her to the bottom of the pool where she drowned (Chua- Eoan). This brings up the question, were these attacks acts of revenge on the trainers? I think it’s shocking that after this whales’ first murder, he was still expected to perform.

These amazingly intelligent animals are captured and put into tanks that would be proportional to a human living in a bathtub. Orca whales swim up to 100 miles a day in the wild and are imprisoned in confining tanks (PETA). Sea World trains whales and dolphins to do tricks such as jumping through hoops, swimming with the trainers and of course, splashing the audience. As a kid, I always left the aquarium in awe of the talent and intelligence of the mammals in these performances. But now I know these tricks and moves are not natural for these animals at all. According to Peta, they are trained by, “withholding food and isolating animals who refuse to perform” (PETA). I don’t think anyone would argue that these tactics are ethical to wild animals.

Many zoos don’t show natural behaviors or natural interactions, we only see trainers handling and feeding the animals. Many zoos and aquariums shouldn’t be applauded for teaching about wild animals; rather, they should only be given credit for showing how some animals are capable of adapting to such a drastic change. Think about the natural habitat of a polar bear; the very cold Arctic Circle, yet there are polar bear exhibits in zoos all over the world, often no where near their natural climate. And I’m sure there aren’t hundreds of people passing by and tapping on the glass in the wild either. Animals in captivity aren’t the same animal they would be in the wild; often these creatures are living a life that nature didn’t intend for them.

Have you ever thought about where these animals often come from? Many are taken from their natural habitats; The Humane Society of the United States believes that the process of capturing wild animals often causes suffering the moment they are taken. When wild dolphins are taken from the ocean, “they are ripped violently and traumatically from their social units” (Humane Society). Often time’s dolphins are fished and either slaughtered or sold to be in such shows. Animals were made to live in the wild, not wherever humans want them to.

Circuses have one of the worst reputations for animal cruelty. When I was 6, I had a Ringley Brothers Circus shirt that I tried to wear as much as I could until it became so worn out that it began to tear. I understand the lure and excitement as a child to see the elephants and tigers do amazing tricks. But, the truth isn’t as glamorous as we are made to believe. The Humane Society states, “The methods used to train these animals are often abusive, and they may be chained or confined for hours on end” (Humane Society). Circuses travel all year round all over the world. Elephants, lions and monkeys are put in small cages and taken from town to town. These animals are often not given proper care and don’t have access to basic necessities while traveling. The animals are only released from their cages in order to perform, and when performing they are sometimes leashed and shackled.

The temperatures and climates these animals experience are definitely not what they would experience in a natural setting. According to PETA, “A young lion named Clyde died in a sweltering boxcar as a Ringling Bros. train crossed the Mojave Desert on a day when temperatures exceeded 100°F” (PETA). There have been many other preventable fatalities of circus animals because lack of veterinary care and basic necessities for survival while on the road.

Not only do these animals experience tough travel and living conditions, the process of training them is very disturbing. The most common method of training is physical punishment, often by hitting, electric shock, and whipping. Many shocking videos have been shot showing the pain and suffering these animals are put through. PETA states:

Video footage shot during a PETA undercover investigation of Carson & Barnes Circus revealed Carson & Barnes’ animal care director, Tim Frisco, viciously attacking, yelling, and cursing at and shocking endangered Asian elephants. Frisco instructed other elephant trainers to beat the elephants with a bullhook as hard as they could and to sink the sharp metal bullhook into the animals’ flesh and twist it until they screamed in pain. The videotape also showed a handler using a blowtorch to remove elephants’ hair and chained elephants and caged bears exhibiting stereotypic behaviors caused by mental distress.

This is a very disturbing account of circus animals being exploited and abused for our entertainment. But, this is a very common occurrence in circuses all over the world.

I don’t think these programs should be done away with, but I think something needs to be done to enforce the accreditation of all zoos and aquariums. I also think animals such as Tilikum who have not adapted very well, should still be held in captivity. There are other options for him such as sanctuaries where he can live in a normal environment with other whales. I also think there should be more emphasis on the Internet to see videos of wild animals. There are other options to learn about these creatures, technology has come so far. But, I think everyone can agree that circuses need the biggest intervention. There needs to be a conscientious effort to help the animals that suffer daily, circuses that raven all over the world should not be allowed to have animals in their shows, I think this issue needs to be discussed in order for a change to take place for these circus animals. I understand the benefits zoos, aquariums and circus bring but we can’t put the lives of these majestic animals on the line for a profit.

Works Cited

Chua-Eoan, Howard. “The Killer-Whale Attack at SeaWorld: How It Happened.” U.S. 25 February 2010. New York Times. Web. 14 March 2010.

Ellis, Richard. “Sea World Killer Whale Attack.” 25 February 2010. Washington Post. Web. 13 March 2010.

The Humane Society. The Humane Soceity of the United States. 2010. Web. 14 March 2010.

Kuehn, Bridget. “Is it ethical to keep animals in zoos?” Journal of the American Veterinary Medical Association. (2002). n. pag. Web. 14 March 2

PETA. People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. 2010. Web. 13 March 2010.

Reflection 2.1

After writing my first draft, I know it needs a lot of work. I started my rough draft with not very much organization; I just wrote down all of my thoughts and they don't seem to make much sense. I also need to work on writing more clearly, because I often say things that make sense to me, but not others.

But, In general writing a Rogerian argument hasn't been too hard. I think it's not very hard because of the topic I chose. I think both sides of keeping animals in captivity are very strong. My boyfriend and I had a VERY LONG debate after I wrote my paper on whether or not zoos and aquariums were a good thing or not. He gave me a lot of very good points on the benefits of these organizations.

I realized that both of us were coming from the debate from different views, I the animal lover and he the one who thinks zoos are very educational. He made the point that without the zoos and aquariums you wouldn't see the animals at all, most people won't be going to Africa to see a safari. But, in the end we both agreed that zoos and aquariums that don't provide sufficient care for the animals are unethical and that circuses all together are not okay. I think I need to use his opposing point of view more in my argument and argue more towards the middle ground about circuses and correct treatment of animals.

Overall, I know my paper needs a lot of work in organization and clarifying my ideas. I also need to make sure my sources are scholarly, and once again work on citations.

Essay 2.1 Animals In Captivity- torture or for education?

Over the years, I have grown up as a complete animal lover. Like most kids, I was always excited to go to the zoo and watch hundreds of different species of animals in their natural habitats. Little did I know, these are not their natural habitats at all. I’ve begun to rethink whether the zoo, aquarium or circus is a good thing or not. There has been much debate concerning whether or not these places are ethical and in the best interest of the animals.

On February 24th 2010, Tilikum, the great orca whale murdered his second trainer at Sea World in Orlando, Florida. According to an article in Time, Tilikum grabbed his trainer, Brancheau, by her ponytail and dragged her to the bottom of the pool where she drowned (Chua- Eoan). This brings up the question, were these attacks acts of revenge on the trainers? I think it’s shocking that after this whales’ first murder, he was still expected to perform.

These amazingly intelligent animals are captured and put into tanks that would be proportional to a human living in a bathtub. Orca whales swim up to 100 miles a day in the wild and are imprisoned in confining tanks (PETA). Sea World trains whales and dolphins to do tricks such as jumping through hoops, swimming with the trainers and of course, splashing the audience. As a kid, I always left the aquarium in awe of the talent and intelligence of the mammals in these performances. But now I know these tricks and moves are not natural for these animals at all. According to Peta, they are trained by, “withholding food and isolating animals who refuse to perform” (PETA). I don’t think anyone would argue that these tactics are ethical to wild animals.

But, I did learn a lot about animals that I would never actually see in the wild. Zoos, Aquariums and circuses do provide easy access to the public to witness the majestic qualities of these animals. We can learn a lot about their basic behaviors in the wild and sometimes get to interact with them. But, do these benefits outweigh the suffering we are putting many of these animals through?

Visiting many zoos we don’t see natural behaviors or natural interactions, we only see trainers handling and feeding the animals. Zoos and aquariums shouldn’t be applauded for teaching about wild animals, rather, they should only be given credit for showing how some animals are capable of adapting to such a drastic change. Think about the natural habitat of a polar bear; but, there are polar bear exhibits in zoos all over the world, often no where near their natural climate. And I’m sure there aren’t hundreds of people passing by and tapping on the glass in the wild either. Animals in captivity aren’t the same animal they would be in the wild; often these creatures are living a life that nature didn’t intend for them.

The Humane Society of the United States believes that the process of capturing wild animals often causes suffering the moment they are taken. When wild dolphins are taken from the ocean, “they are ripped violently and traumatically from their social units” (Humane Society). Often time’s dolphins are fished and either slaughtered or sold to be in such shows. Animals were made to live in the wild, not wherever humans want them to.

Circuses have one of the worst reputations for animal cruelty. The Humane Society states, “We might like to think the wild animals featured in a circus, movie, TV show or commercial are enjoying themselves. But behind the scenes, the methods used to train these animals are often abusive, and they may be chained or confined for hours on end” (Humane Society). Circuses travel all year round all over the world. Elephants, lions and monkeys are put in small cages and taken from town to town. These animals are often not given proper care and don’t have access to basic necessities while traveling. The animals are only released from their cages in order to perform, and when performing these animals are sometimes leashed and shackled.

Also, the temperatures and climates these animals experience are definitely not what they would experience in a natural setting. According to PETA, “A young lion named Clyde died in a sweltering boxcar as a Ringling Bros. train crossed the Mojave Desert on a day when temperatures exceeded 100°F” (PETA). There have been many other preventable fatalities of circus animals because lack of veterinary care while on the road.

Not only do these animals experience tough travel and living conditions, the process of training them is very disturbing. The most common method of training is physical punishment, often by hitting, electric shock, and whipping. Many shocking videos have been shot showing the pain and suffering these animals are put through. PETA states:

Video footage shot during a PETA undercover investigation of Carson & Barnes Circus revealed Carson & Barnes’ animal care director, Tim Frisco, viciously attacking, yelling, and cursing at and shocking endangered Asian elephants. Frisco instructed other elephant trainers to beat the elephants with a bullhook as hard as they could and to sink the sharp metal bullhook into the animals’ flesh and twist it until they screamed in pain. The videotape also showed a handler using a blowtorch to remove elephants’ hair and chained elephants and caged bears exhibiting stereotypic behaviors caused by mental distress.

Circus animals are exploited and abused on a daily basis and forced to perform tricks that are not natural to them at all.

Even though many animals face unethical circumstances, I see the other side of the argument. Letting wild animals be available for public display is more educational then reading about them in a book. Endangered species are often saved by human intervention. Humans can save these species in captivity by breeding and prolonging lives through medical care. Michael Hutchins, PhD, director and William Conway Chair of the Department of Conservation and Science for the American Zoo and Aquarium Association states, “The primary benefits zoos provide to society are education and conservation of species and habitats” (Journal of the American Veterinary Medical Association). I agree, there are many benefits to these organizations but many don’t meet humane standards. Hutchins says less than 10% of animal exhibitors meet the Association of Zoos and Aquariums accreditation. The major zoos and aquariums throughout the United States provide safe environments for wild animals with proper care, but many do not.

I don’t think these programs should be done away with, but I think something needs to be done. I don’t think animals such as Tilikum, the Killer Whale, should still be held in captivity. There are other options for him such as sanctuaries where he can live in a normal environment with other whales. I also think there should be more emphasis on the Internet to see videos of wild animals. There are other options to learn about these creatures, technology has come so far. But, overall there needs to be a conscientious effort to help the animals that suffer daily, this could be done by boycotting businesses that exploit animals in order to make a profit. I understand the benefits zoos, aquariums and circus bring but we can’t put the lives of these majestic animals on the line for our selfish pleasures.

Works Cited

Chua-Eoan, Howard. “The Killer-Whale Attack at SeaWorld: How It Happened.” U.S. 25 February 2010. New York Times. Web. 14 March 2010.

Ellis, Richard. “Sea World Killer Whale Attack.” 25 February 2010. Washington Post. Web. 13 March 2010.

The Humane Society. The Humane Soceity of the United States. 2010. Web. 14 March 2010.

PETA. People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. 2010. Web. 13 March 2010.

Kuehn, Bridget. “Is it ethical to keep animals in zoos?” Journal of the American Veterinary Medical Association. (2002). n. pag. Web. 14 March 2010.

Prewriting Essay 2

For my next essay I want to argue zoo and performance animals. In light of the Killer whale, Tilikum, killing another trainer, I don't think these animals should continue to live at Sea World or in other aquariums.

The opposing views would be: having these animals on display is very beneficial to teaching about these wild species. We would never be able to go see a Killer Whale in it's natural environment and learn about them the way we do from aquariums and other venues.

I believe that we have such great technology now-a-days that we can learn about these animals on T.V. Yes, it's not as interactive or as entertaining but capturing these wild animals and holding them in tanks similar to a human in a bathtub is inhumane. There are other options for these wild creatures after we have captured them and somewhat domesticated them. There are other options, such as a Killer whale sanctuary in Brazil. Here, they can live in a much larger, more natural habitat and still be safe after not growing up in a wild environment. I also think, how can we keep putting the lives of trainers in danger when many have been attacked by the whales ans had near death experiences? We're putting trainers' lives in danger and these whales are obviously angry.

Reflection 1.3

I'm excited that this argument is finally over. In the end, I was very happy with my paper. Going to the writing Center definitely helped me with a few things I was confused about and showing me that a lot of things didn't make much sense; and helped me to clarify.

My writing process can basically be summed up by: after I chose an editorial I was FINALLY happy with, I just researched and researched sources to the point where I had about 25 tabs up on my screen. I would go through and highlight things I liked and good points to help support and that go against my argument. Then I tried to incorporate those sources into somewhat of a first draft. Then for the next draft I first went through and reread it and changed little things I wasn't happy with, I think I even changed sources, added some and took out some. For the last draft, I did the same thing and made changes all over the place and then changed some of the organization. In the final draft I also worked on the comments I was given, such as citing my sources correctly, pulling from the original editorial more, 5Ws and paraphrasing some of my sources rather than all being quotes.

In the end, I'm happy with my final draft and how it turned out. I don't think I've ever put as much time and thought into a paper. I had to think about if I was fulfilling everything we learned and all of the aspects of a successful rebuttal argument.

1.3 Lower drinking age could be step in the wrong direction

Dear De Andra Kenoly,

I recently read your article about the benefits to lower the minimum legal drinking age in The Whitworthian from February 28th 2009. I strongly disagree with this idea because I am very certain it would only turn an unhealthy drinking culture into a worse one. It has been proven that there is a major problem with minors abusing alcohol and that it is on the rise. I understand your duty as an aspiring journalist to write an interesting editorial. I also understand it’s an important issue because you’re months away from turning 21. But, I'm sure as a senior undergraduate student you've seen alcohol abuse by your peers. Something needs to be done, but lowering the Minimum Legal Drinking Age (MLDA) to purchase alcohol will only create more abuse from a wider range of ages.

Your editorial mentioned the Amethyst Initiative, which has had a major role bringing this discussion into the public. According to their website, their goal is to: “…encourage moderation and responsibility as an alternative to the drunkenness and reckless decisions about alcohol that mark the experience of many young Americans” (Amethyst Initiative). John McCardell, the President Emeritus of Middlebury College, founded this group in hopes to change the law and create action. They broke news because of their petition signed by over 100 college presidents all agreeing to the benefits of lowering the MLDA.

These presidents believe lowering the drinking age will create a new culture of drinking in moderation. As good as that idea sounds in theory, I only see this creating a younger age group for binge drinking. Senator Frank R. Lautenberg of New Jersey said, “This small minority of college administrators wants to undo years of success – that defies common sense. We need to do all we can to protect the national drinking age – a law that saves the lives of drivers, passengers and pedestrians across the country each year” (MADD). Many benefits have come from raising the drinking age to 21 in 1985. I think it's safe to say most people, other than young adults counting down to their 21st birthdays, will object to this proposal.
Since the drinking age has been raised to 21, drinking related accidents have decreased by a significant amount. The Department of Transportation has estimated that the 21-year-old drinking age has saved 25,000 lives since 1985 (MADD). It doesn’t make sense to lower the legal drinking age and risk 1,000 lives per year.

College students have easy access to alcohol and often binge drink on the weekends. This is becoming more and more of an issue because of the health risks that are associated with drinking so heavily and in such short time frames, often causing blackouts and regrettable decisions. By college presidents signing petitions to lower the age to 18, they will only be passing the problem down to high school principals. Ruth Engs a professor of Health Applied Science at Indiana University believes drinking is a problem in minors because it is rebellious, she says, “[Binge drinking] is seen as an enticing "forbidden fruit," a "badge of rebellion against authority" and a symbol of 'adulthood'” (Engs, paragraph 2). If the drinking age is lowered to 18, then 16 year old high school students will just be wanting to drink because it’s forbidden and rebellious. Ronald M. Davis, Immediate Past President of the American Medical Association, has a strong opinion on lowering the drinking age. Davis states, “If we lower the age at which young adults are legally allowed to purchase alcohol, we are lowering the age of those who have easy access to alcohol and shifting responsibility to high school educators. The science simply does not support lowering the drinking age” (MADD). This will become a never ending cycle; changing the age to 18 would be irresponsible and would brush the problem under the rug.

You also give evidence that many other European countries have a younger drinking age and that they have a healthy drinking culture. Europeans’ healthier drinking habits are not only related to the actual age, there are other variables in how they are raised that affect their perceptions on drinking. The United States today would not be able to take on these mannerisms by just changing the law, our peers would not be able to adjust to this new idea of legal drinking in moderation. This change needs to be gradual, over a long period of time.

As we’ve seen in many horror stories, not all minors can handle their alcohol, and that’s the cause of the problem. I believe "responsible drinking" is not an option right now, the law needs to be used to prevent deaths and injuries in young people. We cannot lower the drinking age and hope it will work. In the past, states that lowered their drinking ages back to 18 had much higher rates of car accidents in 18- 20 year olds, states such as: Massachusetts, Michigan and Maine (Drinking Age). It makes no sense to me, to give 18-year-olds this power when they will be set up for failure.

Underage drinking is not only an issue in the United States; it’s a worldwide problem. New Zealand is also in the center of this controversy; in 1999 the drinking age was lowered from 20 to 18. According to a study in the American Journal of Public Health, the amount of traffic accidents increased significantly in young adults from ages of 15- 18, it is believed that a higher MLDA would have prevented these problems. These statistics show that lowering the drinking age was not effective and will most likely have the same outcome if this was done in the U.S.

In your editorial you bring up a very strong point, “I am considered mature enough to choose to enlist in the army and perhaps even die for my country. I am also considered wise enough to vote on issues and for politicians to run the country” (Kenoly, paragraph 21). However, we should reconsider when someone is legally considered an adult. The website Why 21? discusses the benefits of the 21 year old drinking age. Their website provides evidence that the human brain does not finish developing until the age of 25 and that, “adding alcohol to the mix is a recipe for disaster” (Alcohol and the Teen Brain). Because scientists agree of the detrimental effects of alcohol on the brain, why would we allow teenagers to have access to something that we know is poisoning them? As you said in your editorial, “Judgment can be clouded when drinking” (paragraph 26). I can’t imagine the increase of bad decisions if the age is lowered to include younger, less mature teenagers.

By lowering the drinking age, alcohol abuse by teenagers would be increased. We should continue to examine and look for better options or solutions to underage alcohol abuse. As you said, “The consumption of alcohol is not the dangerous thing; it is the silence which shrouds the underground drinking scene” (Paragraph 15). I believe better education on alcohol should be set fourth and more conversations about drinking should take place at home and at school in order to teach adolescents to drink in moderation. I do agree that making better decisions about drinking is crucial; but I think there are other options rather than lowering the drinking age in the society we live in today. I think lowering the drinking age to 18 will only cause more abuse of alcohol and send the future of our society in the wrong direction.


Apprehensive College Student,
Danielle Guy



Works Cited

Amethyst Initiative. Amethyst Initiative. 2010. Web. 2 February 2010.

Engs, Ruth. Forbidden Fruit. University of Indiana. Web. 2 February 2010.

Kenoly, De Andra. The Whitworthian. Whitworth University. 28 February 2009. Web. 1 February 2010.

Kypri, Kypros. Voas, Robert. Langley, John. Stephenson, Shaun. Begg, Dorthy. Tippetts, Scott. Davie, Gabrielle. “Minimum Purchasing Age for Alcohol and Traffic Crash Injuries Among 15- to 19-Year-Olds in New Zealand.” American Journal of Public Health 96. 1 (2005): 126-131. Print. 2 February 2010.

Mothers Against Drunk Driving. 2010. MADD. Web. 12 February 2010.

Procon. Web. 3 February 2010.

Why 21?. 2007. Web. 2 February 2010.

Writing Center

I've been so busy all week and have not been able to coordinate when the writing center is open and when I have time to go. I decided to go tonight, even though it was last minute, to get any final advice. I worked on my paper all week and changing things daily, so, I was hoping going to get help wouldn't be too much of and arduous task.

Going to the writing center was VERY beneficial. I didn't think it would help me as much as it did. We read my paper aloud and noticed a lot of little mistakes I had missed proof reading. We changed sentences I didn't like to be more concise and clear.

We also went through each paragraph and gave a brief summary and looked at the overall structure of the paper. We looked at the order of paragraphs and how they flow together. After looking at this I realized some of my paragraphs will go better together and moved some things around.

One of my main concerns was citations. We went through the new MLA guidelines and changed some of my citations. We also changed some of my in text citations that were incorrect. Overall it was very helpful to complete my paper, I expressed my concerns and we figured out how to fix them.

Nazi Tactics Rebuttal Intro

Dear Dr. Williams,

I recently read your essay on the vilification of cigarette smokers in Ideas on Liberty, “Nazi Tactics” from August 2002. After reading this essay I was appalled to say the least, your claims were completely inaccurate and extremely exaggerated. In one claim you say, “As a result of both official and non-official fraudulent claims about the health effects, as well as the health-care costs of smoking, there has been widely successful vilification of cigarette smokers and tobacco manufacturers” (par. 5). It has been proven by many different studies how detrimental tobacco is to a persons’ lungs and how likely it is to cause cancer, how could you possibly say that these are false? The effects to second hand smoke have also been proven and any doctor could tell you this. The government is not out to get smokers, it’s out to protect non-smokers from the health risks they can’t help but obtain in public where smoking is allowed. This “vilification” of cigarette smokers is completely justified because of the risk they put others in, you say, “These people who control our lives are almost finished with smokers; but never in history has a tyrant arisen one day and then decided to tyrannize no more” (par. 7). The government was established to protect its citizens and help make decisions such as these. I never thought protecting innocent lives from tobaccos’ deadly smoke was tyranny; this is a completely absurd claim. It’s not fair to harm a majority of the population by the 20% of Americans who chose smoke (par.4)”

Reflection 1.2

After writing my second draft, I feel more confident with my paper. It's definitely not perfect or how I want it to be in the end, but it's getting there. I worked more in this draft to incorporate sources, I struggled with determining how many were to many sources though. I think it's at a good amount right now. I still want to clean it up and revise it but I think my basic points and the structure are there now. I just want to reword some things and state things differently in my final draft. The feedback I got was good, I only received 2 out of 3 people's comments but I still got a lot of good commentary on my paper. They basically said what I thought they would say and that I just need to strengthen my argument. Overall, I'm much happier with my topic then I was in the beginning and I'm also happy with the sources I've found to help support my argument, I just need to work on citing them correctly and utilizing them where they will have the most impact.

Essay 1.2 Lowering the Drinking Age- Step in the wrong direction

Dear De Andra Kenoly,

I recently read your article proposing to lower the minimum legal drinking age (MLDA)in The Whitworthian from February 28th 2009. I strongly disagree with this idea because I am very certain it would only turn an unhealthy drinking culture into a worse one. It has been proven that there is a major problem with minors abusing alcohol and that it is on the rise. I understand your duty as a soon to be journalist to write an interesting editorial but, I'm sure as a Senior undergraduate student you've seen alcohol abuse by your peers. Something needs to be done, but lowering the minimum age to purchase the alcohol will only create brush this abuse under the rug and cause more abuse from a wider range of ages.

I'm sure you've seen that college students today have easy access to alcohol from friends and are often known to binge drink every weekend. This is becoming more and more of an issue because of the health risks that are associated with drinking so heavily and in such short time frames. Your article mentioned the Amethyst Initiative, which has had a major role bringing this issue into the public to be discussed. According to their website, their goal is to: “…encourage moderation and responsibility as an alternative to the drunkenness and reckless decisions about alcohol that mark the experience of many young Americans” (Amethyst Initiative). As you stated, John McCardell, the President Emeritus of Middlebury College, founded this group in hopes to change the law and create action. They broke news because of their petition signed by over 100 college presidents all agreeing to the benefits of lowering the MLDA. They believe lowering it will create a new culture of drinking in moderation. As good as that idea sounds in theory, I only see this creating a younger age group for binge drinking. Senator Frank R. Lautenberg of New Jersey said, “This small minority of college administrators wants to undo years of success – that defies common sense. We need to do all we can to protect the national drinking age – a law that saves the lives of drivers, passengers and pedestrians across the country each year” (MADD). Many benefits have come from raising the drinking age to 21 in 1985. I think it's safe to say most people, other than young adults counting down to their 21st birthdays, will object to this proposal.

Since the drinking age has been raised to 21, drinking related accidents have decreased by a significant amount. The Department of Transportation has estimated that the 21 year old drinking age has saved 25,000 lives since 1985 (MADD). Looking at this number of lives that have been saved every year from drunk driving accidents makes an impact by itself on why we shouldn’t lower the drinking age back to where it was, obviously it wasn't working in the first place.

Don't you think by college presidents signing petitions to lower the age to 18, they will only be passing the problem down to high school principals? Ruth Engs a professor of Health Applied Science at Indiana University believes drinking is a problem in minors because it is rebellious, she says, “This [binge drinking] is because drinking by these youth is seen as an enticing "forbidden fruit," a "badge of rebellion against authority" and a symbol of 'adulthood'” (Engs paragraph 2). If the drinking age is lowered to 18, then 16 year old high schoolers will just be wanting to drink because its “forbidden”. This will be a never ending cycle, lowering the drinking age is just irresponsible and not actually dealing with the real issues.

You also claim that many other European countries have a younger drinking age and that they have a healthy drinking culture. But one major factor in that they also have much higher driving ages. In the United States, we have a much younger legal driving age which gives rise to this culture by giving more freedom to our teenagers, having a car gives more access to getting the alcohol and more opportunity to be driving while under the influence. Europeans’ healthier drinking habits are not only related to the actual age, there are other variables involved in their cultures. The United States today would not be able to take on these mannerisms by just changing the age, this is not possible, and our country is not ready for this change.

In my eyes as being a college student, by allowing everyone in college to have access to alcohol, then many, many more people would be drinking. The major hindrance that stops many college students from “pre-gaming” is not having as much access too it. Common sense says you are forced to stop drinking when you run out, allowing everyone to go out and get their own alcohol would just keep everyone drinking more and more.

The website “Why 21?” they discuss the benefits of the 21 year old drinking age. Their website says, “A person’s brain does not stop developing until his or her early to mid-20s and adding alcohol to the mix is a recipe for disaster” (Why 21?). At 18 years old, the brain is surely not done developing; many psychologists say the brain continues growing past the age of 25. Scientists agree of the detrimental effects of alcohol on the brain, why would we allow teenagers to have access to something that we know is consider poison? Ronald M. Davis, Immediate Past President of the AMA said, ”It is impossible to ignore the scientific evidence demonstrating the dangers of underage drinking. A young adult’s brain is a work in progress, marked by significant development in areas of the brain responsible for learning, memory, complex thinking, planning, inhibition and emotional regulation. If we lower the age at which young adults are legally allowed to purchase alcohol, we are lowering the age of those who have easy access to alcohol and shifting responsibility to high school educators. The science simply does not support lowering the drinking age” (MADD).

We obviously see that minors cannot handle their alcohol, and that’s the cause of the problem. I believe "responsible drinking" is not an option right now, the law needs to be used to prevent deaths and injuries in young people. We cannot lower the drinking age and hope it will work, this would only create more problems, “States that previously lowered the drinking age to 18, such as Massachusetts, Michigan, and Maine, experienced an increase in alcohol-related crashes among the 18 to 20 age group” (procon.org) It makes no sense to me to give 18-year-olds this power when they will be set up for failure. New Zealand is also in the center of this controversy, in 1999 the drinking age was lowered from 20 to 18. According to a study in the American Journal of Public Health, the amount of traffic accidents increased significantly in young adults from ages of 15- 18, it is believed that a higher MLDA would have prevented these problems.

The laws cannot just be changed because it's being abused, it should be looked into and find a better option. If the drinking age is lowered then we will see the same problem in kids younger then the newly designated age. I believe better education on alcohol should be set fourth and more conversations about drinking should take place at home and at school. As the Amethyst Initiative suggests, maybe we should put in place a drinking license and have to take a class to get you're license just like drivers ed. But instead of making the license available at 18, it should still be at 21. Then, before turning 21 you are more informed about drinking and know the consequences of supplying to minors. I believe there are other options rather than lowering the drinking age, I think this will only cause more abuse of alcohol and send the future of our society down the wrong path.

Works Cited

Alcohol and the Teen Brain. Why 21?. 2007. No pag. Web. February 2, 2010.

Amethyst Initiative. 2010. Amethyst Initiative. Web. February 2, 2010.

Engs, Ruth. Forbidden Fruit. Indiana.edu. No pag. University of Indiana. Web. February 2, 2010.

Kypri, Kypros. Voas, Robert. Langley, John. Stephenson, Shaun. Begg, Dorthy. Tippetts, Scott. Davie, Gabrielle. “Minimum Purchasing Age for Alcohol and Traffic Crash Injuries Among 15- to 19-Year-Olds in New Zealand.” American Journal of Public Health 96. 1 (2005): 126-131. Print.

Mothers Against Drunk Driving. 2010. MADD. Web. February 12, 2010.

Should the drinking age be lowered from 21 to a younger age?. Procon.org. Web. February 3, 2010.

Reflection 1.1

While writing my first draft I was somewhat overwhelmed with all of the sources I found. I was trying to incorporate the best ones, but the most credible ones. Often my sources weren’t quotes but information of websites without authors. I still need to figure out the best way to incorporate that information and other sources. I also had trouble trying to determine how to attack this editorial and how exactly to respond to it- should I go through point by point? Or should I just talk about some of his points and present my own arguments? I’m not sure which of the two I actually went with- but I would say a combination of the two.

The comments I read were basically to use more sources, which reading other people’s rough drafts, I said the same thing to them. Sources are going to be a major aspect in our rebuttals. Sources build your credibility and help the reader to trust you and agree with you. They’re also good for presenting others’ ideas and their opinions that you agree with, such as introducing someone else’s plan to help binge drinking rather than making it your own.

From reading the comments I received, I realized statistics would also help my argument because this is a health issue and statistics on deaths, and injuries will be very beneficial in strengthening my argument. For my next draft, I would like to incorporate my sources better and have better structure to my paper, I feel like my rough draft was somewhat disorganized and not as meaningful as it should be.

Essay 1.1 Lowering the Drinking Age- Step in the wrong direction

http://www.whitworthian.com/2.11399/opinion-lower-drinking-age-could-be-step-in-the-right-direction-1.1578444


Dear De Andra Kenoly,

I recently read your article proposing to lower the legal drinking age. I strongly disagree with this idea because I am very certain it would only turn an unhealthy drinking culture into a worse one. Everyone agrees that there is a major problem with minors abusing alcohol and that something needs to be done, but lowering the age to purchase the alcohol will only create more abuse from a wider range of ages.

College students today are known to get alcohol from friends and to binge drink every weekend. This is becoming more and more of an issue because of the health risks that come with drinking so heavily and such a short amount of time. You talk about he Amethyst Initiative which has had a major role in bring about this debate. According to their website, their goal is to: “…encourage moderation and responsibility as an alternative to the drunkenness and reckless decisions about alcohol that mark the experience of many young Americans” (Amethyst Initiative). This group was founded by John McCardell, the President Emeritus of Middlebury College. This group broke news because of their petition signed by over 100 college presidents all agreeing to lower the drinking age. They believe lowering the drinking age will create a new culture of drinking in moderation. I strongly believe this will just create a younger age group for binge drinking.

By college presidents signing petitions to lower the age to 18, they will only be passing the problem down to high school principals. Ruth Engs a professor of Health Applied Science at Indiana University believes drinking is a problem in minors because it is rebellious, she says, “This [binge drinking] is because drinking by these youth is seen as an enticing "forbidden fruit," a "badge of rebellion against authority" and a symbol of "adulthood”” (Engs paragraph 2). Being called a forbidden fruit is no excuse, if the drinking age is lowered to 18, then 16 year olds will just be wanting to drink because its “forbidden”. This will be a never ending cycle, lowering the drinking age is just irresponsible and not actually dealing with the real issues.

You also claim that many other European countries have lower drinking ages and that they have a healthy drinking culture. But one major factor in that they also have much higher driving ages. In the United States, we have a much younger legal driving age which gives rise to this culture by giving more freedom to our teenagers, having a car gives more access to getting the alcohol. Europeans’ healthier drinking habits are not only related to the actual age, there are other variables involved in their cultures. The United States today would not be able to take on these mannerisms by just changing the age, this is not possible, and our country is not ready for this change.

In my eyes as being a college student, by allowing everyone in college to have access to alcohol, then many, many more people would be drinking. The major hindrance that stops many college students from “pre-gaming” is not having as much access too it. You are forced to stop drinking when you run out, allowing everyone to go out and get their own alcohol would just keep everyone drinking more and more.

The website “Why 21?” they discuss the benefits of the 21 year old drinking age. Their website says, “A person’s brain does not stop developing until his or her early to mid-20s and adding alcohol to the mix is a recipe for disaster” (Why 21?). At 18 years old, the brain is surely not done developing; many psychologists say the brain continues growing past the age of 25. Everyone agrees of the detrimental effects of alcohol on the brain, why would we allow teenagers to have access to something that we know is consider poison? We need to use the law to protect our young people; we are the future, why would we support them damaging their bodies even more? We obviously see that minors cannot handle their alcohol, and that’s the cause of the problem. I believe "responsible drinking" is not an option right now, the law needs to be used to prevent deaths and injuries in young people. We cannot lower the drinking age and hope it will work, this would only create more problems, “States that previously lowered the drinking age to 18, such as Massachusetts, Michigan, and Maine, experienced an increase in alcohol-related crashes among the 18 to 20 age group” (procon.org) It makes no sense to me to give 18-year-olds this power when they will be set up for failure.

The laws cannot just be changed because it's being abused, it should be looked into and find a better option. If the drinking age is lowered then we will see the same problem in kids younger then that age. I believe better education on alcohol should be set fourth and more conversations about drinking should take place at home and at school. As the Amethyst Initiative suggests, maybe we should put in place a drinking license and have to take a class to get you're license just like drivers ed. But instead of making the license available at 18, it should still be at 21. Then, before turning 21 you are more informed about drinking and know the consequences of supplying to minors. I believe there are other options rather than lowering the drinking age, I think this will only cause more abuse of alcohol and send the future of our society down the wrong path.


Works Cited
Alcohol and the Teen Brain. Why 21?. 2007. No pag. Web. February 2, 2010.
Amethyst Initiative. 2010. Amethyst Initiative. Web. February 2, 2010.
Engs, Ruth. Forbidden Fruit. Indiana.edu. No pag. University of Indiana. Web. February 2, 2010.

Should the drinking age be lowered from 21 to a younger age?. Procon.org. Web. February 3, 2010.